The "shitlog"

Her two bits of ocean stared at me in disbelief while she affirmed it was the most surreal thing she had ever heard. I replied it was true; it was even mentioned in a BBC show recently (see video clip here). Yes, we Catalans do hit a log for it to shit presents on Christmas eve. And yes we do place in our chrèche, in a discrete spot, a figure defecating, the "caganer". Let me explain.

Every Catalan home is decorated with a “tió” –which thanks to public schooling has survived as a tradition and coexists with a Christmas tree or crèche or sometimes both-. The “tió” –not “cagatió” and hence not “shitlog” as wrongly translated in the video clip- is a log, usually one irregular and full of holes, nerves and cavities, anthropomorphized with a smiling face and wearing a “barretina”, the typical Catalan shepherd cap. This tradition comes from rural Catalonia, from the time when Santa Claus had not been imported yet and poor communications, isolation and enclaves made the arrival of the three wise men unlikely. The log would be covered with a blanket and children would hit it with sticks and sing for it to defecate sweets and presents previously hidden in the log’s holes and cavities by the parents. Of course the fantasy would have been built up by simulating the log had been fed for a week, with the enthusiastic participation of the children.

I had done that when I was a kid, and when I told my mother about my friend’s incredulity she recalled one of the few vivid memories she has from early childhood: right after Christmas, when her father –the grandfather that I never met, for he passed away long before I was born-, would chop wood for the fireplace, she would lurk and observe attentively, ready to jump for any sweets left.

It is also true that we place in every crèche a character, usually a shepherd, kneeling down and defecating. We place it in a discrete corner, although my brother and me used to get reprimanded by my mother for intentionally misplacing it beside the son of the Father in an act of petty domestic blasphemy. She never spoke of blasphemy though, just of bad taste and lack of respect. She also added that the son of the Father did not deserve that smell.

The tradition has evolved lately, and from having just a shepherd now all sorts of public figures are depicted in this condition or position –from local politicians to Obama, from the best paid player of FC Barcelona to the last top model, which should mean no offence, as in this case it is rather a recognition of a certain notoriety-. In fact the introduction of celebrities reinforces the expression of the main underlying message: bodily functions are natural and universal, and while they should be performed in discretion, they should not be a reason for shame.

I will leave the interpretation of all these pieces of escathologic culture -particularly the second bit- to the folklorists and anthropologists. I just had to write this to convince her I was not pulling her leg and to try providing some explanation. Now if you will excuse me...

Dreams of change

It happened about two years ago. Autumn 2007, which I started based in Montevideo and finished in Paris, with two big pieces to munch in between: first a UNESCO general conference, the sort of marathon we just finish now, right after stepping down the plane after two months of hard work in Uruguay; then, a long and challenging UN-reform related mission in Cape Verde, which concerned the reform in its “UN Wars” version. From time to time I would wake up in the middle of the night in spells of intercontinental confusion, not knowing whether I was in Paris, in Barcelona, in Kolda, in Montevideo or anywhere else. That night I was in Paris.

I dreamt about home, in Barcelona. I had returned to my parents’ place in East Poblenou, where I grew up. I was walking in amazement down the Diagonal Avenue. I saw my old school in Pallars street, in a section where the road had been asphalted only when I was eighteen years old. Looking East I saw the Princess Hotel and the Forum, where the old Camp de la Bota had been; many people had been summarily executed there by the fascists at the end of the civil war in 1939; later there were slums amongst the latest ones to disappear, in the mid seventies. Looking west I saw the Diagonal up until the Glòries area; now it is a beautiful avenue, at the time there were just bits of it between old factories and new housing. Looking south-east I saw Selva de Mar street on its way to the new Diagonal Mar residential area and the beach; that street was opened only when I was eighteen, after the railroad tracks of what had been Spain’s first line had been removed; after the massive Material y Construcciones SA factory had been closed down and demolished.

I could not stop thinking about all these changes. How the city had changed, and how I had changed, how I left Poblenou and my city and embarked in an adventure that took me to Paris, but also to Africa and to South America. Caught in my reflection and still amazed I sat down on a bench. Within a minute a young boy appeared and sat down with me. Blue cat-like eyes, very blond, sunny smiling, he said hello and engaged in conversation. He wanted to know who I was, where did I come from, what I was doing there. He was nice and pleasant, and asked with an innocent eagerness to know that immediately conquered my heart.

Suddenly I realized that the boy was no other than me; it was me when I was ten years old.

I woke up in the middle of the night, my eyes full of tears.

Ferraaaaaaaaaaaaaan!

It is Monday, late afternoon. It has been, as all Mondays, a long day, especially since the good weather permitted a full enjoyment of the weekend. I managed to get home early enough, so I have some spare time after leaving for dinner at Jaïr’s, to welcome a Scots friend based in Beijing who is visiting.

I lay on my bed, reading. I’m finishing one of the most interesting books I read lately: “The uncertainty of hope”, by the London-based Zimbabwean Valerie Tagwira. The novel describes life in Mbare, a disadvantaged suburb in Harare, in 2005, when the government launched Operation Murambatsvina (“drive out the trash”, in Shona language), which consisted in fighting informal trade and all problems associated with slums through a very straightforward approach: forced expulsion of all inhabitants and demolition of any form of housing that lacked an officially approved building plan. Eliminating the disease by killing the patient, in a context where the economy was nearly collapsing by structural problems of the supply chain which would continue for years and would eventually unchain the spiralling hyperinflation that I could see in person. This operation only reinforced the conditions of poverty that was supposed to alleviate.

It was not easy to enter into the story, but shortly afterwards the novel completely captured my attention and became another of those cases I love: when commuting to work becomes too short of a travel, when I allow myself a minute standing on the platform to finish a chapter, when sometimes sleeping hours are affected, but never too much…
-“Ferran!”
I think I heard a voice shouting my name. So now I hear voices? Am I nuts? I carry on reading.
-“Ferran!”
Yes, it was my name! I realize my windows are open, it is hot outside. It must be someone who knows where I leave and who is looking for me… What a strange thing!

I look through the window and the mystery vanishes with an enormous surprise. My friend Anand! He used to be my neighbour, up until he went back to India by the end of 2006. My landlady put us in touch, and that was the beginning of a beautiful friendship, made out of long conversations about music, cinema, life and whatever else was on. I was absent on the occasion of all his recent visits to Paris. Today I am very pleasantly surprised.

We met and we established a good relationship as neighbours, which is something rare in Paris. While these things become increasingly scarce in the “developed” world, I come from a culture where neighbours are always well known, sometimes even an extension of the family. This is uncommon in Paris, a particularly anonymous city where people, be it out of shyness or complete lack of interest, very seldom make contact with neighbours, unless there is a leak or something similar. Actually people are famous in Paris for speeding up to close the door of the lift or of their house to avoid contact with neighbours. By the end of the spring, the municipality organizes every year “la fête des voisins”, so people have a space to meet!

Besides that, Anand did something that brings me back to childhood. He passes by, and in fact he is not even sure that I still live here, yet he sees an open window and just shouts out. Great, and even more unusual, as our culture’s evolution is such than going to see someone out of an impromptu becomes increasingly rare. A French friend completely astonished me with his reply on the phone. I just said “hey, it’s been a while, let’s get together for a drink”, thinking about sometime after work. He fired his reply: “I am free on Saturday afternoon in three weeks time”. Needless to say we did not meet.

My friend will be in Paris at least for a month and a half, as he is editing a documentary. His presence coincides with the nicest time of the year. Great!

In memoriam: Michael Jackson

Thursday evening. I get home, tired after a long working day which I finished with a good swim. One of those when you just enter home and land on the bed. Nonetheless I do not want to sleep without a bit of music. Today I feel for a classic: the last four songs of “Dark Side of the Moon”, by Pink Floyd, a masterpiece of contemporary music. One of those to listen to only from time to time, yet always enjoyable.

I listen lying on my bed, through the iphone headphones. It is the last tunes and the incidental sounds of the very end. A voice says “there is no dark side of the moon, really…” with a heart beating in the background, presumably the same one you can hear at the beginning of the record. Right at this moment, the end of the record, a text message comes in. A good friend says: “Michael Jackson is dead. :(”. Is that so? Oh… Tomorrow will be another day.

Next morning news is all over. Which is logical, given his worldwide popularity. His death came as an unexpected surprise, yet I do not feel particularly sad. I was never his fan, and I always found excessive to devote so much attention to someone who lived in his own amusement park, where he was slowly whitening while facing very serious accusations of child molestation. I found it excessive even if I could understand the reasons behind it.

However, I must acknowledge that Michael Jacksons' decease is the death of a symbol of the last quarter of the XXth century, an artist with a unique impact in the world of music, where he introduced his original fusion of styles, from rock to disco through pop and soul; also for his revolutionary innovations in dance, notably his moon walk. And most of all for being the first Afro-American artist who broke the glass wall and became a world icon for all races alike.

Michael Jackson brings me back to my childhood. I was barely nine years old when the mythical “Thriller” was released. When video clips had just appeared and were slowly making their way in terms of music promotion, Jacko released fifteen minutes of a real movie that kept us all glued to our seats in amazement, in a move that changed the genre forever. This is the Michael Jackson I will remember, the one I feel a part of my cultural background; the member of the Jackson five, the fresh creative man of the first half of the eighties. Before success, popularity and a very complicated history turned him into a pathetic character. Someone who could afford anything he liked but could never be really happy, to the point of turning his life into a circus that will probably continue after his death.

May he rest, finally, in peace.

That SIMCA 1200

I am just about to get to the office when I found the jewel in the picture, parked in a corner of Place de Fontenoy, in the heart of Paris’ VII arrondissement. I cannot help taking a picture, as this car is old enough to be very rare. Moreover, this SIMCA immediately evokes a great stream of memories.

For that is my childhood’s car. My parents had one, a SIMCA 1200, which had originally been red and I knew only in blue. Plaque B-8775-Y, it lasted from the early seventies until July 1987, when it was replaced by a Ford Orion. It must have run for more than 150.000 Km. I still remember vaguely that night, on National road II between Malgrat de Mar and Vidreres, in one of the countless allers-retours from Barcelona to Palafrugell, when we excitedly saw the meter going from 99.999 to 00.000.

I always liked that car. It was relatively rare and hence easily recognizable. I used to like its rounded forms that I preferred to other’s cars at the time. I always saw two eyes in those lights, like a smiling face that looked at me. So many hours spent at the back seats with my brother, teasing each other. Seeing a black plaque (a French one, like the one in the picture) would be a pretext to pinch the other. And so many other games that used to irritate our parents. The runs to see who would get to touch the car first after a day on the beach. And the long imaginary travels I used to do when I could sneak in the car and sit at the wheel on my own.

All that melancholy that used to fill me when we would leave Palafrugell for Barcelona and I could see the town through the rear window. The stops in Caldetes to get water at the thermal source. As a small kid I failed to understand how could it be that we could drink it after a while if it was so hot. Those huge traffic jams when going through Mataró, when I used to amuse myself observing the path taken by that coin towards the money box at the neon sign on top of Caixa Laietana. And so many other moments that come to my mind thanks to objects’ enormous evocative power. More than twenty years ago.

Private transport and second residence, symbols of a new middle class emerging from the Francoist “desarrollismo”, the same middle class that finished by forcing the coming of democracy. People who had to build their future by working and remaining passive and silent in a repressed and repressive society, in a regime that was first totalitarian then authoritarian and legitimized itself in this prosperity, yet never abandoned or denounced its violent and criminal essence. This very prosperity was the beginning of the end of that horror. Thanks to the effort of people like my parents I could grow up in a free country.